there once was a girl from nantucket
her head was like that of a bucket
you think thats big?
you aint seen a thing
you should see the size of those OH MY GOD ARE THOSE YOUR ANKLES CAUSE THOSE ARE THE BIGGEST.ANKLES.EVER.

happy birthday big seester.

in honor of your many years of life, i shall remind you of the horrible things you did to torment me as a child:
-when mom would leave you in charge, you would write her notes about how naughty i was and put them on the highest shelf where i couldnt reach them
-you say something along the lines of 'youre adopted' or 'i overheard mom tell dad that she didnt want you anymore' and when id get mad and scream youd smile all smug-like and say 'see, thats why'. (you did that alot. i hated that the most. i hated that smile. i kinda want to slap you right now while i think about it)
-you were sneaky and quiet and VICIOUS. (damn, that was smart)

and now, because im not the 'naughty little sister' i once was, i'll give you a few things that made me love you despite the VICIOUS. and the QUIET.
-in 1st grade, every morning i would cling to you sob and scream when you would have to leave to go to your wing of the school. and every morning you would hug me and tell me i would be ok and that you wouldnt be far away. you didnt hiss at me or belittle me or whisper mean things about being adopted.
-even though you were 5 years older and WAY TOO COOL for it, you would play dress up with me and do my hair in silly ponytails all over my head. and you would smile (not the smile that makes me want to slap you) and laugh and pretend that you werent too cool (i admit, you were kind of a dork and maybe you werent too cool for it but because its your birthday we will go with the former story)
-even though you always threatened to tell, you never told mom any of my secrets until we were older and we started telling her things just to watch her face squish up and tell us that she hoped we really never did those things. but we so did.
-and you kick so much ass now that it physically hurts to think that youre all the way out in arizona. partly because im jealous of the warm weather, true. but mostly cause you are a damn fine sister. i cant say i want to grow up like you because i have unfortunately already grown, and youre way shorter, and lets face it, cool or not cool, you cant achieve this.

i love you anj.
way to be 29.