3.02.2004
today i miss my ex-husband.
i dont miss him in a way that wants him back in my life, or to have him as my husband again, but i miss him in the way anyone misses someone theyve lost. this is the best ive seen it explained. the list of things i dont miss is unimaginable. im not sad anymore, and i gave up on being bitter a long time ago. but he walked away from our kids. and that i cant forget, and cant miss. i dont miss who he is and every horrible immoral thing he stands for. i dont miss the nightmares or the gut feelings a wife gets when her husband doesnt come home at night. i dont miss the desperate feeling of hanging on for dear life to the drama that was our life. somedays i dont know if the monster he is today was the cause or the result. im okay with not knowing. im okay with moving on. finally, im okay.
but still, sometimes, i miss the guy that i married who did silly things like this...
i dont miss him in a way that wants him back in my life, or to have him as my husband again, but i miss him in the way anyone misses someone theyve lost. this is the best ive seen it explained. the list of things i dont miss is unimaginable. im not sad anymore, and i gave up on being bitter a long time ago. but he walked away from our kids. and that i cant forget, and cant miss. i dont miss who he is and every horrible immoral thing he stands for. i dont miss the nightmares or the gut feelings a wife gets when her husband doesnt come home at night. i dont miss the desperate feeling of hanging on for dear life to the drama that was our life. somedays i dont know if the monster he is today was the cause or the result. im okay with not knowing. im okay with moving on. finally, im okay.
but still, sometimes, i miss the guy that i married who did silly things like this...
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